


It's Not The Drugs

by SarahHowell_Lester



Category: Matty Healy - Fandom, The 1975 (Band)
Genre: Addiction, Anxiety, Dark, Darkness, Depression, Drugs, F/M, Fanfiction, Guilt, Hate, Heart, High School, Love, Misery, Music, Romance, Sad, Sadness, addict, flaws, matty healy - Freeform, the 1975
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-20
Updated: 2016-03-20
Packaged: 2018-05-27 23:27:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,025
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6304411
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SarahHowell_Lester/pseuds/SarahHowell_Lester
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There are plenty of people to love. There are plenty of drugs to take. But I'm addicted to you. -Matty Healy fanfiction-</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

"You have to get out of this town if you ever want to amount to something," they'd always say to me. It started when I was 5 years old. Pushing me to be better than everyone else, having the most successful friends, having to have a perfect GPA, and if I was anything less, I would not amount to anything. I am only 15 now, and everything I've ever known has been around perfection. But I've always known that there's more important things in life. Mental health, especially. Mostly because I have never been the most happy person in the world. Depression and anxiety are both hell, but when mixed, you're fucked. 

My mother was a stay-at-home mom. My father worked for the local caves. Blanchard Springs is what they called them. And it is beautiful there. I always go there during the summer to relax, explore and just be myself. Me and my family live in between a town, and a community. We called it Newnata. The town's name was Mountain View and the community's was Timbo. The school that I've went to all of my life was Timbo Elementary/High School. It's not the biggest. 

You know what they always say, strict parents create sneaky kids. That is true. My parents will not let me do a single thing. No going out with friends alone, no one-on-one time with my piece of shit boyfriend, no listening or watching anything with even the word "hell" in it. They are devout Christians, which is a good thing, but I think that makes them stricter. 

We go to church every Sunday. But it's not your typical church. You do not have to wear fancy clothing, you don't have to look a certain way, have a certain car, etc. like most churches expect. This is where most of the attendees listen to heavy metal and screamo, and your youth pastor has loads of tattoos. It's the best. Me and my best friend go there together. But I'm trying to get my other friends into it also.

Since we lived in a small town, there weren't many people around. Behind my house was about 6 acres of just wooded land with two ponds. I liked the isolation. It gave me a place to think and just work things out. I had permission to go onto our neighbors land also. They were across the street but below their house was a creek. The locals called it Painter Branch when in reality it's called Panther Creek. I always ride my 4-wheeler down there and just watch the creek roll.

Bonfires were a must in this county. For peoples birthdays, random summer nights, holidays, the coldest nights of winter, and they were the best. Drinking usually happened. I had always resented but I tried once and now I love it. 

This town doesn't have much to offer but I feel like it's the best place. We never really see new people, I've spoken to almost everyone here, excluding one. I think he's fascinating, but everyone tells me not to go around him, that he's bad, his family is bad, the people he hangs around are bad. I've always steered clear of him.

That was until now.


	2. Chapter 1

"...And that's how you get the angle of elevation," our Geometry teacher said just as the bell rang for 3rd period. We all filed out of the room and headed to our lockers. I put my Geometry book away and closed my locker to find Atticus, my boyfriend.

"Hey, can I talk to you about something?" He said. 

"Yeah, sure." I answered.

"How would you feel if..." His voice trailed off, "We split ways?" 

I could feel tears forming in my eyes already. "If that's what you want, I can't do anything about it," I managed to choke out.

"Okay," He said, "I hope you'll be okay."

"Don't worry about me." I said. He nodded and left just when Leah and Reese approached me. We walked to class together.

We walked into the cold and bright room we had Greenhouse Ag in. The window was open to the Greenhouse and the door was open to the Shop. We stood in the classroom for about 5 minutes until our teacher, Mr. P peaked through the open window. "We're down at the saw mill, ya'll need to come out," He said. We trailed out to the Shop and out the garage door. We got to the mill and figured out we couldn't do anything to help so we sat in Mr. P's truck. Leah and Reese were talking and I was just sitting there thinking about Atticus. I mean, he wasn't the best boyfriend but I was still upset. I may have just liked the fact I had someone like everyone else.

"I'm going to the playground for a bit." I said and got out of the truck. Since it was just a few feet away, I thought it'd be a good place to ponder. I say on one of the vacant swings and looked up to the sky. Heavy, dark clouds filled the sky. It was probably going to rain. I looked back down and just started thinking. Which is a trait that I hate. I think way too much and it makes me crazy. About 10 minutes later I heard a voice come from behind me.

"What are you doing out here while it's raining?" A smooth British voice said. I turned around to see one of my classmates, Matty Healy. I've never talked to him a day in my life. He was wearing a white t-shirt with a leather jacket over it, ripped black jeans and military boots. "Are you going to answer me or are you gonna keep staring?" His voice made me jump.

"Oh. Uh.. Sorry. I didn't notice it was raining." I said.

"Must have been thinking real hard to not notice it's raining." He said plainly.

"Yeah well that's just what I do." I said, "I should probably go."

"What were you thinking about? Just curious." He said. I had only just met him, and he's asking this question? It took me a minute to answer him.

"Uh... My boyfriend just broke up with me." I said. My voice had no emotion whatsoever. Why am I telling him these things?

"Oh. You mean Atticus?" He asked. How did he know?

"Yeah. You know him?" I asked.

"Not really." Matty said, "I've seen him around." I just nodded. "You wanna talk about it?" He asked, "You don't have to if you don't want to." I don't know why I'm telling him things in the first place. He seems like a nice guy despite all of the things I've been told about him. Should I really talk to him about this?

"I would like to, yes." I said, surprising myself.

"Hey! It's time to go!" I heard Leah yell from the saw mill.

"I have to go." I said to Matty.

"It's okay. Maybe we can talk about this later?" He said.

"Yeah. I would like that." I said and smiled.

"Good." He smiled, "Later then." He turned and went on his way. I watched him go. His brown curly hair was bouncing as he walked. His hands were in his pockets and he was looking down at the ground. I have to admit, he is a beautiful human. 

"Come on!" Leah yelled at me again. I made my way toward them. 

"I'm here, I'm here." I said and rolled my eyes.

"It's time to go to History." Reese said. We made our way up the hill back into the Shop. It was still about 3 minutes until the bell rang. I sat on the desk in the front of the room and thought about Matty, and how he was. Could he really be as bad as people tell me he his? He doesn't seem like it, yet. But he could be totally different and people just see what they want to see. I don't know. But I really want to figure that out.


	3. Chapter 2

The sun leaked through my window as I rose in my bed. I checked my phone. 8:03 A.M. Before I realized that it was Saturday, I hopped out of bed and started to my closet. Then I heard a knock on my door. "Yeah?" I said. "Why are you already up?" I heard my mom say through the door. I opened it.

"I'm getting ready for school." I said bluntly.

"Today is Saturday, Cecilia." My mother said. 

"Oh. Well, I have plans today anyways." I said, not really having any plans.

"What plans?" She asked.

"I'm meeting Leah in town to hang out and stuff." I said.

"Well okay. Do you need a ride into town?" She asked. 

"No, Att-" I stopped myself. Atticus won't be taking me. "Yeah, I do."

"Okay. What time do you need to be there?" She asked.

"About 9:30." I said.

"Okay. Well, get dressed then." She said and left the room.

I closed my door and went back to my closet. Dress or jeans? Jeans. Tank top or t-shirt? Tank top. It was hot as fuck outside, even at 8 in the morning. Cowboy boots or tennis shoes? Cowboy boots, definitely. I threw a cardigan over my tank top, fixed my hair, and put in my earrings. Before I left the room I grabbed my phone, my headphones, and my bag.

I walked into the living room to see my father sitting on the couch watching some kind of car show, and mom was still in her room getting ready. I sat my bag down and walked to the screen door. I was nice outside but the grass was still a little wet from the rain last night. I walked back to the couch and sat down and got on my phone. I had a message. I opened it and it was a number that wasn't in my contacts. 

It read, 'Wanna hang out today?' I just replied, 'Who is this?' 2 minutes later I got a reply back. 'It's Matty. The city park at 10?' Since I didn't have any real plans I just told him 'Yeah. I'll be there.'

Just then, mom walked into the room. "Are you ready to go?" She asked. I looked at my phone. It was 9:00. "Yeah." I replied and grabbed my bag. We were out the door in just a few minutes. I listened to music all the way into town. I told mom to drop me off at the court square and that Leah would be there in just a couple of minutes. She went on and left so I started around the square and down the huge hill beside the bed & breakfast. It was a pleasant morning and lots of people were out and about. I made it to the bottom of the hill and I got another text. 

'I'm here.' Matty had sent me. 

'I'll be there in a couple of minutes.' I texted him back and made my way toward the Lutheran Church. The park was just up from there. I turned left and jogged past the RV park and finally I was there. The swing sets were empty so I decided to look down in the amphitheater. He was there, standing on the bridge watching the tiny waterfall. I made my way down the steps and into the open area right before the creek. He looked up and saw that I had arrived, and started toward me. 

"Hey. How are you?" He asked.

"I'm doing okay, I guess. What about you?" I replied.

"I'm good." He said.

"So.. Why did you want to see me?" I asked.

"So we could finish talking." He said.

"Oh. I thought that we'd talk at school or something." I said.

"Why talk there when we have more time outside of it?" He questioned.

"Okay.. But why all of a sudden you're talking to me. Why is that? I don't even know you." I said.

"I thought I'd try to help you. Since you just lost your boyfriend." He said.


End file.
